Where Everybody Knows Your Name
Ahhh…this past weekend we went up to San Francisco to see some of our friends and family. What a breath of fresh air (literally and figuratively)!! We moved to Los Angeles almost 3 years ago and prior to living in SF for 5 years, I lived in Milwaukee for the first 27 years of my life. I don’t consider myself as someone who’s moved around a lot, but I definitely have emotional roots in two places (SF and Milwaukee). Then I find myself praying for a private jet so that I can see my peeps in both places any time I’d like :D
Right now, it’s easier than ever to move wherever in the world we want to! And we do! Maybe we go to college far from home or maybe our job transfers us to another city. We might even be inspired to move to a different country. When contemplating leaving, we probably tell ourselves that the internet, text messaging and phone calls will keep us comforted and connected. However, after not too long we realize all of these communication tools don’t make up for having a real human connection. And then the loneliness might set in…
Loneliness is a big problem in America and can cause depression, anxiety, panic, low self worth, improper eating, and lethargy. When it wasn’t so easy to move from place to place, there was a sense of belonging, community and support. There were birthday parties, bbq’s, baby showers, housewarming painting parties, and of course, lots of hugs. When those ties are severed (no matter how fabulous the adventure), we can feel isolated and like we’re wandering around all by ourselves.
Now, I’m not saying don’t take fabulous adventures or make new life changes. Please do!! But also be aware that loneliness is REAL. If you suffer from negative emotions of any kind, take a look inside and ask yourself if it’s loneliness. Don’t think of it as a lame excuse or that you should be tougher than that. If you find that loneliness is one of the roots of your sadness, it’s definitely something to pay attention to and remedy the best you can.
Some tips to help loneliness:
• Seek out a new community. Some examples might be yoga workshop, church choir, community theater, work colleagues, a volunteer group, knitting class, a professional group (like Ladies Who Launch), an art class, or an outdoor fitness class. And there are a bizillion more! *Despite the title of the post, do not visit your local tavern each night for drinks. It’s not Ayurvedic*
• Get a landline. Cell phones have a small but very significant delay and they can drop when you’re in the middle of something important. Landlines help us feel closer to the person on the other end.
• Use saffron. Make saffron rice or make a warm saffron cocktail. Saffron nourishes and stablizes the heart.
• Be open to a relationship. It might be more important than you think. I’m not saying any ole’ crappy relationship, but a good one. Stay open, stay looking, stay smiling and stay positive.
• Plan to see them. Even if it’s months away, having a weekend planned to see your comrades (meet in the middle) will boost your spirits knowing you’ll see them soon.
• Abyhanga (massage). It calms vata and the nerves. The sense of touch is instantly comforting. Use warm sesame (vata), almond or coconut (pitta), or sunflower (kapha) oil. Warm the oil and apply toe to head, all strokes toward the heart, clockwise around the joints. Then shower and pat dry.
• Do So Hum daily. It will shift your energy, open your heart, and rid any negative emotions.